Cute Girl Attack
by Mar Mercader

Early in the morning, the Castaways are waken up by a strange noise from the beach. They all run there, just to find the noises are coming from a boat-thinly, full of girls trying to pull it on the sand altogether.

 Lina: What's it this time? Another crossover?

 Firia: Sure. I'm sick of crossovers!

 Zel: Yes! I never thought Iıd say this, but I miss the QoS's scripts!

 Xel: You're so insensitive! You should miss the Queen of Swords, not just her scripts! I miss HER!! WAAAAAAA!

 Blink-blink.

 Amelia: He's a little stressed, that's all.

 Gourrigan: No, Amelia, it's more complex than you think. He's trying to prove his parents he's not a fai-

 Mar: Will you stop looking how we work and come to help us?!

 Surprised glances from the castaways, who seem to have just noticed the little brunette in front of them.

 Lina: And who are YOU, by the way?

 Mar: I'm this week's writer. Any problems, little flat-chested kid? Because I know the QoS, you know, and I can...

 Xelloss: Oh! You know My Goddess?

 Suddenly, he stops crying. While the other Castaways are trying to stop Lina fireballing, or Dragonslaving, or better both, their new director, the girls in the beach start asking for some help, too.

 Rezo: Xel, what an awful joke.

 Amelia: And, just for my curiosity, who are all that people?

 Mar: They are the Marmalade Boy feminine Cast.

 Gourrigan: Marmalade What? What's that?

 Mar: Marmalade Boy is a manga made by Yoshizumi Wataru. It's also an anime, 76 episodes. Really good.

 Firia: I think I've heard of it. It's a shojo, isn't it?

 Mar: You're right. It's the story of a girl called-

 Zel: Great. A  ƒ˘#@ing shojo. It was just what we- Hey! Who's that damn sexy red-haired girl?

 Lina: Zel, please... You'll make me blush...

 Zel: Who's talking about you? I mean that chick!

 Mar: ...Koishikawa Miki. If you let me talk, I'll tell you. She's the main character of the series, as I was saying before you interrupted me.

 Rezo: Look! There are lots of hot-looking chicks right there with her! Let's go and help them!

 All the male Castaways run to the beach, while the female ones look angrily to Mar. Mar: I have no authority. Nobody listens to me.

  Unnoticing her, the boys start talking to the new girls, who laugh a lot and make poses.

 Naga: Hey! It's not fair!

 Amelia: Yeah! Zelgadis is MINE! Witches!

 Naga: No! I mean, they have lots of girls and we have no boys!

 Mar: They're just late. Look! Here they are.

 All the girls, now, are running to the beach, to help a lot of incredibly handsome guys arrive to the island with another boat-thingy. Sorry, kids, no cash for more or better.

 Martina: They must be bishounen!

 Yuu: No, actually we're not. But we have had the opportunity...

 Lina: Sure! Aww, they're soo hot!

 On the Castaways's Village, there is a brunette becoming a storm.

 Mar: Must... maintain... control... I'm the writer, I can control them... COME HERE RIGHT NOW, IF YOU WANT TO KEEP YOUR JOB!!

 The Marmalade Boy cast and the Castaways arrive to the huts, talking with each other as if they were long time separated friends.

 Lina: This girl is a little old-fashioned, isn't she?

 Mar: Oh, shut up! Now, let's prepare the whole thing, right?

 Zel: Prepare the whole thing? Have anyone ever told you that you express yourself as good as a closed book?

 Mar: Close. Your. Mouth. Please. We have to talk about this week's episode. I was looking forward your suggests. Anyone wanna say anything?

 Gourrigan: Cool! A democratic director!

 Ginta: Just a question, director... How old are you?

 Mar: *Uh* I- *Ahem* Iım... I'm fifteen.

 Ginta: What? A crybaby will be our scriptwriter?

 Mar: Hey!!

 Naga: I can't believe it! She's as old as Amelia! And SHE'll be the DIRECTOR! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaa!!

 Mar&Amelia: Hey!!!!

 Lina: And-

 Mar: KNOCK IT OFF!! Calm down you all, ok? Ginta; talk again and you'll be engaged with Tsutomu in a nice yaoi fanfic as soon as I finish my school exams! Naga; sure you don't want to let the others know about your little plastic surgery in your more characteristic zone, do you?! And please, Gourrigan, make your girlfriend stay quiet!

 Blushes, gasps, then sheepish looks and innocent faces.

 Mar: Better now. Now let's start. May you separate into two groups, please? Yes, one with the Castaways and the other with the Marmalade cast. Right. Weeell done.

 Sylpheel upraises her arm to ask something, professor mode.

 Mar: What happens, Sylpheel?

 Sylpheel: Where'd Xel go, Miss?

 Mar: *gasp* Miss?

 All of them start looking for him, but no way; he seems to have disappeared.

 Gourrigan: Maybe Lost the Van King of Philadelphia, or something like that, has given him a lift to Japan with his robot!

 Lina: He left weeks ago, Gourrigan.

 Gourrigan: Who knows. Maybe he returned.

 Lina: Yeah. ESCA! FLOW-NE!

 Gourrigan faints before hearing the supposed chorus.

 Miki: Let's think, right? We must be reasonable. Maybe he has been kidnapped. Did he have any enemies?

 Zelgadis: Yes. Lots. Amounts. Zillions. Firia, here, is one of them.

 Firia: And I'm sure I'm not the only one!! @˘#ing Mazoku!!

 POP! Tail upraised! Be careful, people!

 Arimi: Look! She has a tail!

 Miki: It's weird! Does it hurt?

 FLUSH! Mace on her hands! Situation approaching critical!

 Meiko: And it has a pink ribbon on the end! It's so-*ahem* so-

 Firia: It's so what, honey?

 Yayoi: So nice! You have a great taste, you know!

 Arimi: Actually, I prefer Linaıs style. It's sooo fashionable!

 Lina: Yes, I knew. thanks...

 Meiko: But Amelia's costume is really nice!

 As the girls start chatting about clothing and pink ribbons, the guys make a little chauvinist macho assembly.

 Zel: The red-haired girl is mine!

 Gourrigan: Hey! Lina is MINE, not yours!

 Zel: Not Lina, doof! I mean the other red-haired girl! Whatshername... Miki!

 Yuu: Sorry, stone pal, but she is MY girl. Weıve been the main couple in MMB for all the 76 episodes and the 8 volumes of the manga. So, find another one.

 Zel: Aww. And what about that gorgeous blue-haired one?

 Ginta: Don't dare to touch her!!

 Gourrigan: Zel, you're a little excited today, aren't you? Maybe some Funky Fruit has helped?

 Rezo: He's my dear grandson/great-grandson! I'm so proud of him!

 Yuu: Grandson/great-grandson?

 Zel: It's a long story. Is the brunette free?

 Tsutomu: NO!!

 Zel: AAH!! Why Marmalade Boy?! Why Marmalade Boy?! There are lots of animes with cute single chicks! The Gunsmith Cats, Sailor Moon, Evangelion... But no! It had to be Marmalade Boy!

 Gourrigan: Calm down! You have Amelia!

 Zel: Oh. You're a great help.

 Meanwhile, Sylpheel, the only one who really cares a little about the depressed Mazoku, is wondering where now Mar is, too.

 Sylpheel: Great. It's just great. Now she's lost, too. While this ones are arguing and the others are talking about fashion.

 She loses her line of thoughts, interrupted by some strange noises from Martina and Zangulus' hut. Sylpheel runs to it.

 Sylpheel: No! It can't be! They can't be- uh. She's fifteen and he's over 1000! This must be illegal!

 Much to her relief, they are in that hut. Only that they are sobbing, hugging each other and cuddling a QoS plushie, probably from the ACME shop.

 Xelloss: She left me! But I still want her! WAAA!

 Mar: Poor Xel! Don't cry; my problems are worse. I wanted to write a funny episode for this week, and send it to her, but *sniff* this people *sob* are just so ungrateful! I can't work properly with them! I have no authority!! WAAA!

 Sylpheel: Can anyone bring a nice sedative... Or a little of Funky Fruit? This two really need some!