Daisuke was currently lying on his back quietly giggleing at the roof. It was made out of hay, he thought. Upon further thought, he decided that yes, horses eat hay. Since he was hungry, therefore, he was a horse. And so the scene that Gourrigan walked in on was Xellos laughing his fruity ass off at Daisuke jumping up and trying to bite bits of straw hanging down from the roof.

Gourrigan: "Xellos, why is Daisuke trying to eat the roof?"

Xellos, who decided that discretion is the better part of valour (being more fun), Merely smiled and replied "He thinks he's a horse." And, smiling infuratingly, it took him a couple seconds to realize what he had said.

Gourrigan: "Why does Daisuke think he's a horse?"

Xellos frantically tried to stem the tide of truth flowing from his mouth, but it was a lost battle before it began.

Xellos: "I gave him a cappachino from the old funkyfruit-distillation machine I made"

Gourrigan: "How do you make a cappachino from a funkyfruit-distillation machine?"

Now, Gourrigan's question violated the entire premise of the show, but Xellos still had to tell the truth. With a final scream of anguish, Xellos ran off into the forest, leaving Daisuke, who was now trying to turn himself into a woman with cold water, alone with Gourrigan.

* * *

Meanwhile, Lina and her merry troupe were still hunting the author. Since said author left a trail the size of an obese elephant, their job wasn't that hard and they soon caught him. Sadly for one person, Amelia was first to spot him.

Amelia: "Oh, mister Author sir, I'm so sure that with your interest in plot development and contuity will surely be wielded Rightously to unite the bueatiful, smart, and Just princess (blush) with her Fabuolus. charming, handsome, bishounen, rock hard warrior who hides his love for her behind a false mask of disdain, in a futile attempt to hide his raging passion."

Luckily, the Inane Author slept through this. Not so luckily, Zelgadis hadn't and was busy being sick. Lina, hearing an Amelia rant going on, quickly raced with Naga, Rezo, and Sylph to save whoever was on the recieving end. Zangalus and Martina, haveing decided it would be better if the group split up, had long dissapeared into the underbrush, where they will stay if we want to keep our "R" (A18 in Canada) Rating.

* * *

Ryoga woke up. Some people wake up slowly, in stages. Living as a meal-on-hooves, however, tends to turn people into more high-strung speed wakers. Ryoga checked in his left hand, and saw with relief that Akane's present was still there. Feeling *something* smooth, soft, and slighty giving in his right hand, he found that it was gripped around a silk nightie. A big, goofy grin encompasses his face as he remembered last night with the gorgeous blonde with green eyes. They had talked, she had laughed, and they had drank. And drank. And drank. He became depressed, he talked/slurred, she listened. Funny, though, he couldn't remember how he ended up here with the Nightie in his left hand. He shrugged. After all, what could have happened? Suddenly, a shriek rent the air, and he went to investigate.

* * *

Lina: "My god, that's inhuman! He actually SLEPT through one of Amelia's speeches? I've GOT to get him to teach me how to do that!"

Naga: "OH-Hoooooofffffff"

Not-So-Sadly, Naga's laugh was cut short by a suddenly VERY awake Inane Author.

"My, the sky sure is blue today. What, is that a new ragged old shirt, Amelia? Lina, something about your hair seems different today, I think it looks more stunning then usual, if that's possible." And so the Author sucked up to the gang, not knowing why they had chased him, but he was sure as hell desperate for a god complex, any god complex at all. Sadly, this was when his inner Kuno came into play.

* * *

Daisuke looked at his hands. He waved them slowly, leaving trails of fingers floating through the air. Then he giggled. Yes, this is important and there will be a quiz.

* * *

"FEAR NOT FAIR MAIDENS, FOR I AM NOW HERE TO RESCUE YOU FROM THIS LACK OF INSPIRATION AND WRITERS BLOCK, FOR I AM NOW GIVEN MY RIGHTFUL CONTROL OF THIS BODY" WITHOUT, ahem, without pausing, Inane Klone Kuno spotted a double-x chromosme nearby, his brain went into auto-lock "IF THOU DOTH DEFEAT ME IN FAIR COMBAT, THOU SHALT BE GIVEN THE PRIVILAGE OF DATEING THE PASTEL THUNDER OF GOURRIGANS ISLAND." Lina and Naga slow-w-w-wly backed away from the author, who was now brandishing a shiny bokken. /\/\/\ Quick Note: Any idiot can weild a sword. It's simply thrusting, cutting, and the effective killing of an enemy. Flourishing a less-effective, but more pretty way of useing a sword, and involves catching the light just right. Brandishing is a combination of the two, resulting in high-damage, fancy, and impressive 20-hit combos. /\/\/\ Seeing as he was obviously insane, they paused when they thought they were a safe distance away. Sylph became engrossed with the shiny laptop that had appeared with the God-complex, and was hacking into the pentagon while giggling girlishly. Amelia, recognizing a fellow practitioner of circular breathing and booming (annoyingly penetrating) voice, immediatly started to speech back at him in some inane-almost-language. Zelgadis, being caught between the Inane Author and Amelia speechifying at each other, soon passed out and ceased to care about the outside world. (hey, I'm not gonna make the guy take both Amelias AND Kuno's speeches. Even my cruelty has limits.)

* * *

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

WARNING! WARNING! WARNING!

To prevent the possible traumitiazation of our audiance (yeah, like Martina and Zangalus doing it 24/7 hasn't done that already), I will state now that no-one is killed, but a nasty bruise is suffered. But to preserve dramtic tension, I won't say who.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

Gourrigan was bored. And Daisuke was high. Thus, upon the screaming departure of Xellos, critical mass was obtained and something happened. Gourrigan first amused himself by sneaking around Daisuke, tapping him on the shoulder, then moving to Dai's other side. Daisuke eventually became convinced that he was just imagining the he had shoulders. Next, since Dai stopped responding, Gourrigan fishbowled Dai. (If you've never done this to someone who was high, then you should.) Moving his mouth without makeing a sound, and watching as Dai screamed at him to take the (non-existant) Fishbowl off his head, Daisuke eventually tried to break the fishbowl against Gourrigan's head. Three seconds later, Daisuke and Gourrigan were peacefully passed out on the floor. At this point, Daisuke obtained the bruise.

* * *

Authors last words under the mobs fists:

QIZ: HOW MANY FINGERS WAS DAISUKE HOLDING UP??

A: NONE, HORSES DON'T HAVE FINGERS!

Hehehehehehe, thought they could steal my god complex, did they? Well, my inner Kuno is now loose (along with, apparently, my boxers. I didn't know that those.......things, can't remember the word, that Kuno wore were so drafty.) And I'm not sure if this is really a good thing, but oh well. Fishbowling someone is when you place an imaginary fishbowl on their head, then moveing your lips without saying words. So long as no-one else speaks and nothing else makes any sounds, this is hilarious. What happened to Ryoga, and Who Shrieked, and Why? Tune in next time, same Island channel, Same Island time. On GOURRIGAN'S ISLAND, INVASION OF THE OOMPA-LOOMPA'S!!!!!!!