"’Princess and Bandit Killer, Lovers’?!" Amelia screeched and threw the tabloid at Urlich. "’Princess of Justice a Felon’?!" She threw that one at Url, too, but before she could pick up the next one, Urlich smacked his hand down onto the top of the stack with an annoyed growl.
        "Getting hysterical about it won’t help!" He pushed Amelia’s shoulder with his other hand and easily knocked her backwards into her chair. The large table he used to work on Lina’s case was between them. At the moment, more than a dozen tabloid newspapers from Seyruun and Rratsnek and everywhere in between were strewn atop his legal documents. Each sported an unattractive portrait of Princess Amelia and an equally unflattering headline to go with. There were also ugly pictures of Lina with articles detailing her exploits, though not very accurately, according to Gourry and Amelia (the truth, they said, was much more exciting). However, the Princess wasn’t interested in those stories.
        She put her face in her hands and wailed: "I’m ruined! Daddy’s ruined! Seyruun is ruined! Waaaaaaaaa!"
        Urlich rolled his eyes with a sigh and glanced over at Lita Sorez, who was sitting on the edge of the bed with one of the tabloids in her lap. She had Gourry and Naga to either side of her, eagerly reading the trash over her shoulders. Seeing that, Url stalked over and yanked the paper out of Lita’s hands with a reprimanding scowl for the trio, then stomped back to the table and threw the tabloid down on top of the others. It was evening of the day before Lina Inverse’s trial, and Url was showing the stress. It didn’t help that Prince Phil had sent a team of Seyruun’s finest lawyers to defend Amelia. According to the letter they’d brought from Jessica, the plan was for them to follow Urlich’s advice. However, after a brief conversation with the three squeaky clean examples of legal perfection from Justice Central, Urlich had absolutely no confidence that they’d listen to anything he had to say about how to practice law in Rratsnek. It also didn’t help that Rratsnek was stuffed to the gills with unsavory elements from near and far, who’d come to see the infamous Bandit Killer Lina Inverse get her just desserts. Urlich was sure he sensed a few Mazoku in that lot, his father included. Why Xellos hadn’t shown his face to them became evident right around suppertime when the evening edition of Rratsnek’s excuse for a legitimate newspaper arrived in the hands of the person assigned to officially inform Urlich of who he’d face in court. Url had read the headline while hearing the identical information from the messenger. It pleased him not at all that the press had received the news before he did.
        "Why is Xellos the Special Prosecutor?" Princess Amelia sobbed through her hands. "As if this nightmare isn’t bad enough already! We’re all doomed! Waaaaaaa!"
        Which didn’t help Urlich’s self-confidence one bit.
        "Amelia," Gourry said comfortingly as he left his seat to put his hands on the Princess’ trembling shoulders, "what can a Mazoku possibly know about the law? At least Url studied it, right, Url?"
        "Doesn’t matter!" Amelia sniffled just as Urlich opened his mouth to answer Gourry’s question. "He’s Xellos! He isn’t interested in the law at all! He just wants to destroy Miss Lina—and me!"
        "Why would he want to destroy Lina?" Urlich asked with an impatient frown. "She’s useful to him, if everything you’ve told me and I’ve heard of her previous…let’s call them adventures…is any indication."
        "Are you saying he’s here to help her?" Lita asked incredulously.
        Urlich shrugged. "My father’s motives never follow the laws of reason. He could just be here on a lark, for all we know, though I doubt it." He pulled up a chair opposite Amelia and sat down with a thoughtful look on his face. "He was quoted in the article as swearing to remove the Inverse Menace from the world for the good of all living things. That’s a good one. Xellos wants to save the world from a proven agent of chaos. I’m not buying it."
        "Me, neither," said Gourry and Amelia at the same time.
        Naga raised a curious finger and asked. "Is Xellos really that bad? I thought he was kind of cute."
        FACEFAULT!
        "Are you serious?" Urlich sputtered.
        "You think he’s cute?!" Amelia gasped. "He’s the chief servant of Beast Master, who’s one of the five generals of Shabranigdo! Xellos is evil, not cute!"
        Naga pouted. "Well, he didn’t seem that bad to me. He always had that happy, little smile on his face." She imitated it for them with eerie precision.
        All together now: "Nagaaaaa!"
        "He’s totally evil!" Amelia added in exasperation.
        "Completely," Lita agreed.
        "You said it," said Gourry. "I never liked him but I like him even less after what he did to Zel and Amelia."
        Amelia turned red and waved her hands at Gourry to shut him up, but it was too late. She hadn’t told Naga about her Xellos dreams, or about what she’d done to Xellos at Zhara’s house when she’d thought Zelgadis was dead-dead. (Not just temporarily dead.) If Naga was going to know about all that, Amelia really wanted to be the one to tell her and not in front of everybody. It wasn’t an easy thing to talk about.
        Naga narrowed her eyes at Amelia. "What did he do to you?"
        "Um…"
        Naga turned her curious gaze on Gourry, who folded his arms and looked away with an angry expression. She looked to Lita, who wouldn’t meet her eyes, either. That left Urlich, but he turned to Amelia.
        "What…did he…do?" Naga asked more firmly with a fire sparking in her eyes. She clenched her fists and went to get in Amelia’s face. "Tell me! I want to know!"
        "No you don’t…" Gourry muttered under his breath.
        Amelia bit her lip, then wiped her eyes and with a deep breath, told Naga everything. When she was done, Gourry and Urlich had to hold Naga down to keep her from storming off to make "that sick monster bastard" pay for what he’d done to Amelia.
        All of a sudden, Urlich got an idea. Actually, it was more like a moment of extreme clarity. He had a vision. In that vision, he saw his father’s face on the cover of a tabloid under a headline that read: "Special Prosecutor Stalker-Rapist". He grinned and couldn’t keep himself from laughing. It was perfect! And there were at least four other witnesses present in Rratsnek who could corroborate Amelia’s accusations, not to mention Jessica and Prince Phil in Seyruun, and Zelgadis—wherever he was at the moment.
        "What are you laughing about?" Naga demanded with a narrow-eyed glare at Urlich, having stopped struggling when his giggles started.
        "I just had a beautiful idea," Url chuckled and turned a happy smirk on Amelia. "Princess, you’re gonna love this. We’re going to fight fire with fire."
        Amelia just looked suspicious. "Like how?"
        Urlich’s grin got even wider as he went to the table, picked up one of the tabloids and held it up for the rest of the group to see. "Xellos has been stalking Amelia, right?"
        Nods.
        "He’s been trying to rape her in her dreams and has assaulted her in the waking world, right?"
        More nods.
        Url patted the tabloid and grinned. "I think these people would be very interested in that story, don’t you?"
Amelia emphatically shook her head. "I don’t think that’s a good idea at all, Mr. Urlich! My reputation is ruined enough as it—"
        "Amelia," Urlich cooed and put his arm about her shoulders, "you have nothing to be ashamed of. What did you do wrong, hm? It was all Xellos, wasn’t it? He attacked you, he stalked you—in fact, we could infer that he got this Special Prosecutor gig for the sole purpose of being close to you so he could continue his perverted activities. That’s hardly proper conduct for a self-proclaimed champion of good, law-abiding citizens, now is it?"
        Amelia frowned thoughtfully. "Since you put it that way…"
        Url smacked her on the back and chuckled his way over to the table. "And the best part is, it’s all true, whereas these stories about you are clearly lies. Right?"
        "Of course they’re lies!" Amelia wailed. "Mr. Urlich, how could you doubt—"
        "I know they’re lies, that’s what I’m saying." He winked at her. "You just leave everything to me, Princess. Gourry, bring me my crystal ball; it’s in my jacket, over there." He pointed to the coat rack by the door. "I’m going to get Jessica and Phil to leak the same information in Seyruun. We’ll make this whole tabloid smear campaign against you look like a conspiracy by Xellos to bring down the Royal Family. That’ll discredit him, so he’ll be removed as Special Prosecutor, which means—"
        "We’ll get a normal person to prosecute Miss Lina!" Amelia crowed and clapped her hands with delight.
        "As normal as you’ll get in Rratsnek," Urlich muttered.
        As he handed Url his crystal ball, Gourry moaned: "The way our luck works, the replacement’ll probably be Beast Master, or the Lord of Nightmares, or somebody like that."
        Glare.
        "That wasn’t funny, Mr. Gourry…"

        "I’m hungry," Sylph griped. "If this is such a party pocket, where’s the food?"
        Zelgadis lay on his back and stared at the ceiling, having at last grown weary of pacing and complaining—much to Sylph’s relief. He was really getting on her nerves, which were pretty frayed, anyway after her altercation with Beast Master. Speaking of which, she was still stinky and gooey from that.
        "Furthermore, I want a bath!"
        "You’ve been sexier," Zelgadis agreed, having also tired of yelling at her to quit whining about how icky she felt.
        Sylph didn’t have the energy left to slap him for that one, so she just growled, instead. "Where in the hell is Melfinius?! He must’ve realized we’re stuck in here by now! Oooh! I’m gonna rip him apart when I get back to Marrigan!"
        "Get in line."
        "And if you hadn’t dropped your bag when we were fighting Zelas, we’d be able to call Zhara and get her to go over there and kick his ass!" Sylph added with a much louder growl.
        Zelgadis growled back. "Well, excuse me, but I sort of got thrown into a tree when a certain Mazoku Lord appeared out of nowhere!"
        "That wouldn’t have been a problem if you hadn’t been running so fast!"
        "Oh, we’re back to that, are we?"
        "Yes, we’re back to that!" Sylph huffed and turned her back on him. "You’re so irresponsible! And I don’t think I need to mention the stupidity of buying this pocket, do I?"
        "It would only be the billionth time you’ve mentioned it!" Zelgadis snapped back. "If you thought it was so stupid, why didn’t you stop me?"
        "I tried to stop you, as I recall!"
        "And you were just so effective!" Zelgadis muttered.
        "EXACTLY!" Sylph retorted. She rolled over and propped herself up on an elbow so she could glare down at him. "You’re a stubborn, uncontrollable child, Zelgadis Greywers, and it’s about time you started thinking about how your actions affect those around you! Like me, for instance!"
        Zelgadis sat up and glared back at her. "Nobody invited you along, Sylph."
        "And if I could get out of here, I’d leave!"
        Zelgadis’ eyes flared. "FINE!" He flopped back down and turned his back on her.
        She did the same. "FINE!"
        "Bitch…"
        "Asshole…"
        Pause.
        "That was delicious," Zelgadis grinned, "but I guess you’re still hungry, huh?"
        "Shut up."
        And that was when Melfinius finally got around to processing Zelgadis’ payment and ownership papers for the little dimensional pocket, realized who he’d captured, found the owners manual and went to deliver it personally. "A thousand apologies!" He began in a fluster, then stopped abruptly and wrinkled his nose. "Gods, what is that awful stench?"
        Zelgadis snickered. Sylph was less amused. She jumped up and snatched the owners manual out of Melfinius’ hands with an angry growl. "Zelas Metallium has bad breath, ok? What took you so long?"
        Melfinius blinked at her as he tried to sort out what she was talking about, then very delicately reached up to hold one of his voluminous purple sleeves over his nose. "You were in Beast Master’s mouth? You poor creature."
        "No shit, poor creature!" Sylph snarled. "I jumped into her smelly craw to save his sorry ass," she pointed behind her at Zelgadis, who was having a nice chuckle at her expense, "and this is what I get for my valiant sacrifice? I was willing to die to save his worthless life, and all you two can do is give me a hard time about how smelly I am?! Of course I’m smelly! I’m covered in demon spit and mucus and puke and I’ve been ripening in here for most of the day thanks to you!" She stabbed the little wizard in the chest with one of her claws, making him jump back with a painful yelp. The little blood stain that shortly began to spread from the hole she’d made was only marginally satisfying. "I’m hungry, I want a bath, and I want to kill both of you!"
        Zelgadis wasn’t laughing anymore. She was willing to die for him? "Sylph, I—"
        She threw up a hand to silence him though she still refused to turn around and look at him. "No! I don’t want to hear it! You can just save your pathetic little apology for somebody who actually cares!"
        "Sylph, don’t be like this," Zel persisted. "I didn’t think you’d die for me…I mean, I’m just this asshole stone guy, right? That’s what you always—"
        "Shut up, Zelgadis." Sylph fought back the tears that would’ve ruined her big snit and glared at Melfinius instead. "I don’t feel like reading the manual," she threw it over her shoulder at Zelgadis, who actually owned the pocket, "so tell me how I can get out of here."
        "Where are you going?" Zel asked in a very small voice. "Rratsnek?"
        "Marrigan, dumbshit," she growled. "I’m going home. I want a bath and a nice meal and to sleep in my own bed and—and—"
        Zelgadis let the book drop and wrapped his arms around her from behind. "I’m sorry, Sylph. It’s all my fault."
        "D-damn right it’s—" she sniffled, then turned around and sobbed onto his shoulder. "That bitch! I’ll kill her, I swear I’ll kill her! Then I’ll kill Xellos! I hate them! This is all their fault! They’re always ruining my life!"
        Melfinius raised a bushy eyebrow at the scene before him. The boy’s heart had seemed cold when they’d talked in Marrigan, and now here he was playing the repentant boyfriend with Sylph. Hm. Could be a trick, of course. After all, it was Xellos’ sneaky blood in him. But…he did seem sincere… Melfinius cleared his throat, and the two broke up their embrace with a start, as if they’d forgotten he was there. "I believe you wanted the exit spell?"
        Sylph wiped her face and nodded.
        "To go back to Marrigan," Zel sighed unhappily. Now that he was in danger of losing her, Zelgadis found he actually wanted Sylph along on his journey.
        She shook her head. "I was just mad when I said that. You were trying to get to Rratsnek to help Lina. We can go there, but I really want to go someplace where I can get a bath and something to eat!"
        Melfinius smiled. "You may exit this dimension anywhere you like. Likewise, you may enter it from anywhere. So, if you wish to exit into Rratsnek, even at a specific point in that nasty place, you can do it by modifying the spell. It’s really quite simple, all in the owners manual, which you…ahem…really shouldn’t leave lying about like that." He pointed at the little book, which Zelgadis had dropped when he went to comfort Sylph.
        With an embarrassed cough, Zel picked it up and tucked it into his tunic. "Right. So what’ll it be, Sylph?"
        She shrugged. "The only clues you’ve actually found are Firedrake and Naga, so I think you should continue on to the battlefield, don’t you?"
        "They don’t have baths there," Zel told her with a hesitant smirk. "I’ve been there, remember? And no restaurants, either. It’s not exactly a tourist destination."
        Sylph sighed. "You really want to help Lina."
        He nodded.
        "She has lots of help there already," Sylph told him gently. "I know you don’t like Urlich, but Lina really is in good hands with him, even if Zelas was telling the truth about Xellos being the Special Prosecutor."
        "She was," Melfinius interrupted. He waved his hand in the air, kicking up a swirl of magical sparkles that turned into a copy of the Rratsnek Informer, the same newspaper that had gotten Urlich’s panties in a wad. He handed it to Sylph, who held it where Zelgadis could read it with her. Along with the cover story with its interview of Xellos the Champion of Justice, Peace and Freedom (she almost gagged on that concept), was a nasty expose on Princess Amelia’s sexual preferences. If the article was to be believed, Lina and Amelia were much more than mere friends. Much, much more, and the article was more than happy to expound upon the titillating details of the two young defendants’ alleged trysts while on the road committing the crimes that had made Lina so notorious.
        Just reading the headline turned Zelgadis’ face bright red: "Seyruun Princess Bandit Killer’s Sex Slave". Zel gulped. "This is journalism?"
        Sylph and Melfinius glared at him.
        Zel coughed. "And you think Urlich can handle this all by himself, do you? In a town that calls this piece of garbage a newspaper? I don’t think so." He took the paper out of Sylph’s hands and was about to burn it with a fireball, when she grabbed it back.
        "It might have useful information!" The kitsune snapped. She folded it up and stuck it in his tunic, since she sure as hell didn’t have any place to stash it on her own person.
        "Like what?!" Zel demanded but he didn’t try to fry the newspaper again.
        Sylph shrugged. "I don’t know. Comics?"
        "I don’t think they have enough of a sense of humor in Rratsnek to put funnies in their newspaper, Sylph," Zelgadis argued with a disgusted frown. "I think you just want to read that sex slave article, you furry little pervert."
        She turned her nose up at him with an indignant snort. "Don’t be ridiculous. I already read it. I’m a speed reader, you know."
        "It’s continued on another page," Zel informed her in amusement, "and you didn’t turn any pages. At least they didn’t include illustrations…"
        Melfinius cleared his throat. "Not on the front page. That could be construed as pornography, which is against the law in Rratsnek. And if there are illustrations in the interior pages, they’d have to cover the…" he waved his hands about as he searched for a good way to describe it, "nasty bits."
        Zelgadis’ jaw dropped, and his cheeks colored again. "Writing about it in lurid detail isn’t pornography?!"
        Melfinius and Sylph shook their heads. "Apparently not," the wizard told him, "though I’m inclined to agree with you that it is. Disgusting what some publications will do to sell more papers!"
        Zelgadis thought it was also disgusting what a certain weird wizard would do to sell more gimicky magical products but he didn’t voice his thoughts, being more concerned with his friends’ predicaments in Rratsnek.
        Sylph frowned worriedly. "If the legitimate press is printing this kind of trash, I don’t even want to try to imagine what the tabloids are printing…"
        "No, you don’t," Melfinius agreed with snort, "but if you’d like a summary, Zhara and I have been keeping up as best we can, considering the enormous amount of material that has come out in the mere two days since Lina Inverse’s arrest."
        "You’ve been…keeping up?" Zelgadis asked in a dangerous voice and raised an eyebrow at Melfinius, who took a cautious step back. "Why? Bored?"
        Cough-cough. "Well, actually, Queen Jessica has been sending the Seyruun publications to Zhara and Urlich—she’s in Seyrunn, you know."
        "Yes," Zelgadis told him coldly, "we know." He took a step toward Melfinius, who took a matching step back.
        "She’s acting as Prince Phileonel’s Press Secretary," the wizard continued, trying to maintain his dignity. "The Prince is in a very delicate position, as you can imagine, with his daughter’s moral conduct being called into question as it is. She is the heir apparent, after all."
        "We know that, too," Zel growled.
        Sylph put a hand on his shoulder to stop his advance on Melfinius. "What is the Prince doing about damage control?"
        The wizard stopped backing away and straightened his robes with a glare for Zelgadis. "Jessica is handling that. I believe Prince Phileonel issued a statement to the media denouncing the filthy allegations in the tabloids and reaffirming his faith in his daughter’s innocence and integrity. For all the good that will do," he finished in a cynical mutter. "He sent a team of lawyers to Rratsnek with orders to obey Urlich. As if that will happen! Idiot!"
        Sylph nodded. "I agree. But I also understand why Phil had to send them. It was for PR, more than anything else. He had to do it so his people would see he wasn’t going to take this insult to their country lying down."
        "They’ll ruin everything," Zelgadis groaned, "if their approach to justice is anything like Amelia’s. Does Url know any mind control spells?"
        Sylph sighed and shook her head. "Even if he did, it would only make matters worse if it was discovered—which it would be, by Xellos." She jabbed a finger in Zelgadis’ face and added with a keen look: "Now that I’m really thinking about it, you’re involvement won’t help, either. You’ve been with Lina longer than Amelia has, isn’t that right?"
        He nodded, not sure he liked where she was going with that line of talk.
        "And you fought by her side, yes?"
        Nod.
        "Taking part in her destructive activities?"
        "Now wait just a second, Sylph!" Zel stopped her, waving his hands between them defensively. "If they pull me in, they have to pull in Gourry, too! He was with her when I met her."
        Sylph grinned and nodded, and Zelgadis realized he’d just made her point for her. If he went to Rratsnek, it was very possible—likely, even—that he’d find himself on trial as Lina’s accomplice, if the Rratsnekians decided to take her to task for more than just the offense for which she’d been arrested. Considering all the unnecessary death and destruction Zelgadis had seen her dole out during the course of their association, he didn’t think it would be too hard for them to find something to latch onto. On the downside, now he was worried about Gourry, too. That guy wasn’t clever enough to defend himself in a war of words, particularly when those words were in legalese. Actually, Zel was a bit surprised that Gourry hadn’t been charged with anything yet. Or had he?
        "Melfinius," he asked thoughtfully, "have you seen any articles about Gourry or Naga yet?"
        The wizard raised an eyebrow and thought about it a moment. "They’ve been mentioned in a few pieces but only in the context of being Lina Inverse’s traveling companions. Nothing disgusting or accusatory, now that you bring it up. Oh, except for a brief, amusing write up of a drinking contest they had last night. Apparently the locals found it cute, not offensive."
        "Public drunkenness from Lina’s two oldest sidekicks doesn’t bother them," Zel mused, "but Princess Amelia slapping some guy who got fresh with her does. Gourry has been traveling with Lina for almost four years now, and Naga was with her before he was. Certainly longer than she’s known Amelia or me."
        "But Amelia is the Crown Princess of Seyruun," Sylph reminded him, "and Gourry and Naga are nobody famous."
        Zelgadis insisted: "We’re talking about people being associated with Lina! If it’s a problem for me to be associated with her, then shouldn’t it be a problem for Naga and Gourry?"
        "Xellos is the Special Prosecutor," Sylph said in a cold voice. "He’s not interested in Gourry or Naga, but he’s sure as hell interested in you."
        Zelgadis’ stomach knotted up at the reminder and he gave up the argument with an angry sigh. "And he seems unusually interested in Amelia, as well, these days."
        Sylph nodded. "Right, but she’s stuck in Rratsnek, while you’re free to move about." Her voice softened as she put her hands on his shoulders and looked intently into his eyes. "Zelgadis, I don’t think your friends in Rratsnek would take it kindly if you abandoned your quest, since they were trying to help you when they got into trouble. We should go on to the battlefield and find the clue. If Lina’s still in trouble, we should then go to Zephilia and Luna Inverse. We should gather as many clues as we can, and let Urlich get Lina out of trouble. Please believe in him, Zel! And besides, it’s not as if they only have Urlich to depend on! Jessica is helping from Seyruun, and it’s obvious Zhara is keeping an eye on the situation, as well. I really think we should keep looking for clues, whether or not Beast Master was lying about the time limit."
        "Which I think she was," Zel grumbled without much enthusiasm.
        Melfinius shook his head. "No, she wasn’t. There is a time limit, though I don’t know how Zelas knew about it before I was told…or even why she would be told, for that matter. Very odd…"
        Zelgadis and Sylph turned astonished glares on the old man, who just gave them an offended look in return. "She said the Lord of Nightmares told her," Zelgadis informed him in a dark tone. "You mean she told you, too? When was this? Before or after I left Marrigan?"
        "After!" Melfinius hurried to assure him and backed up a couple steps in the face of the chimera’s anger. "It was this morning, as a matter of fact!"
        "And you planned to tell me…when?"
        The wizard looked indignant. "I can only answer direct questions about your quest, not volunteer information. So, I would have told you when you asked me about it, which was just now."
        Zelgadis clenched his fists and fought the urge to reduce Melfinius to ashes where he stood. Technically, he hadn’t asked Melfinius about the time limit. Sylph had only said Zelas had mentioned it, then Melfinius had volunteered that she hadn’t lied about it. However, Zelgadis didn’t want to ruin this lucky break by pointing that out. "Thank you," he grunted through his teeth. "So what is the time limit, exactly? Zelas said the next New Moon. Was she correct?"
        Melfinius tugged his beard and fidgeted in irritation. "The New Moon? Rubbish! Where did she get that? Trying to make you think you had more time than you do, no doubt!"
        "More time?!" Sylph and Zelgadis exclaimed at the same time. "I have less time than that?!" Zel added in horror.
        The little wizard snorted: "You have until the next Full Moon! Hmph!" He chuckled. "Lucky for you you fell into my little pocket when you did, eh?"
        "This isn’t funny!" Zel screamed at him. "The next Full Moon is only four nights away!"
        "And you’re missing three clues, if I recall correctly," Melfinius reminded him with smug satisfaction. "Once you do find all of the clues, you must sort out what they mean and how those meanings translate into pieces of a spell, then you must get the scrolls with the spell fragments on them from me in Marrigan, and—"
        "Yeah, yeah, we know all that!" Zel shrieked in his face. "But how am I supposed to do it in four days?!"
        By way of response, Melfinius smirked and gestured around him. "You may exit and enter anywhere you please…remember?"
        Zel and Sylph exchanged looks and the lights went on in their heads at the same time. They nodded. Zel said: "Oh yeah. That’s right."
        "You may thank me at any time," the wizard told him smugly.
        "If you’d bestowed this handy little gift upon us on purpose," Sylph growled at him, "which you didn’t. We tripped over it by accident."
        "And because of my cleverly placed promotional device," Melfinius told her airily, "you were at once saved from being eaten by an angry Beast Master and were given the means to travel in an instant. Nothing is truly an accident, you know."
        "Whatever," Sylph sighed in aggravation. "Just tell us how we can use this thing, so we can get started."
        "Then I want you to personally take a message to Rratsnek for me," Zelgadis told the wizard with a dark glare that killed any protests before they even began. "Tell Urlich I started to come there to help, but then we found out about the time limit. Got that, wizard? Tell Urlich everything. Then go tell Jessica to quit horsing around with Phil and find the rest of my clues. Oh, and summon my pack. I dropped it when I ran into Zelas."
        "I am not your errand boy—" Melfinius began to protest, but the look in Zelgadis’ eye caused him to think better of it and comply. "You have his eyes, you know," he grumbled as he watched Zelgadis go through his things to make sure nothing was missing. "Xellos’ eyes, when he’s not playing the happy fool, and the eyes are truly the mirrors of the soul."
        Zelgadis paused as he was putting the owners manual and newspaper into his pack and looked up at Melfinius with death in his eyes. "What are you saying?"
        The old man met his gaze with a level one of his own, no longer the flamboyant showman. Zelgadis could clearly see the wizard’s great age and power in that look and knew in that instant why L-Sama had chosen Melfinius to be the custodian of the spell scrolls. "Nothing you don’t already know." With that, he waved his arms and disappeared in a puff of glittering golden sparks.

        Melfinius’ note appeared in Urlich’s lap just as he was getting up to go talk to Lina one last time before visiting hours ended. He turned it over, and his eyes widened when he saw Melfinius’ purple wizard’s hat seal on the back. Amelia, Gourry, Lita and Naga gathered ‘round as he eagerly ripped it open with a knot of dread in his stomach. When he’d gotten it open, he read it aloud:
        "Mr. Metallium, I am sending you this note at the behest of Zelgadis Greywers, who has just purchased a pocket dimension from me."
        Urlich raised an eyebrow. "He did what?"
        "Keep reading!" Amelia urged him.
        Urlich did: "He and Sylph happened upon it by accident whilst escaping Beast Master, who, I understand, almost made a meal of your ex-wife, who had jumped into the mouth of the beast to save Zelgadis’ life. The two were on their way to Rratsnek to help Lina Inverse when they encountered Zelas Metallium."
        "I knew he wouldn’t abandon us!" Amelia cheered and hugged Gourry.
        Urlich kept reading: "In light of information given to me by the Lord of Nightmares, which information I subsequently passed on to Mr. Greywers, that gentleman has decided to continue to seek clues to his cure, rather than join you in Rratsnek. That information being that he has only until the next Full Moon, four days hence, to assemble L-Sama’s spell and cast it, or it will expire. Mr. Greywers felt seeking clues was a better use of his time, since Miss Inverse is in the capable hands of yourself and those of her companions not charged with crimes. Mr. Greywers has also instructed me to send a message to Queen Jessica of the kitsune to tell her to, and I quote, quit horsing around with Phil and find his clues. He wishes you all good luck."
        "Is that all?" Gourry asked.
        Urlich nodded. "That’s it."
        "What’s that under his signature?" Amelia asked and pointed at the writing.
        Urlich pretended to have only just noticed the PS and started to sweat. "Oh, that’s nothing—"
        The Princess grabbed the letter out of his hands and read it herself. "PS: I gave Mr. Greywers a copy of today’s Rratsnek Informer so he could read about the cases against his friends." Amelia gulped. She pushed the letter at Urlich and went to his work table, where the newspaper in question lay amidst the other publications. She looked at the front page, saw that the article about her being Lina’s sex slave was still there, then had to sit down. "He…he saw that…that…" she pointed at the article with a shaking finger, then burst into tears.
        "I think he meant the article about Xellos," Lita offered weakly. "That’s the big article, see?" She pointed at it, and Amelia came up for air long enough to look where she was pointing, then went back to sobbing.
        Naga looked over Amelia’s shoulder at the paper and shook her head. "It says ‘sex’ in big letters," she observed sagely. "Men always read anything that has to do with sex."
        Gourry rolled his eyes and pushed Naga out of the way so he could massage Amelia’s shoulders. "You’re not helping, Naga. Anyway, I know Zelgadis. He’s pretty naïve, so I’m sure he won’t read that article. It’d be too embarrassing for him. He wouldn’t believe it, anyway, Amelia, you know that!"
        She sobbed loudly.
        "And he knows Lina is involved with Gourry," Urlich added with a glare at Naga, who looked like she was about to say something that probably wouldn’t have been anymore helpful than her last comment. "You’re making a mountain out of a molehill, Princess. Give the guy a little credit. He’s becoming evil, not a pervert."
        Everybody glared at him for that.
        Urlich cleared his throat. "Maybe I should go tell Lina about this latest development." He turned on his heel and headed for the door but stopped with his hand on the knob. Looking over his shoulder, he said quietly: "I think he’s doing the right thing, if my opinion matters." Then he opened the door and headed for the dungeon.

        In the tomb of Lara Sorez outside of Seyruun, Jessica read Melfinius’ message, then crumpled it up and threw it into a corner. "Four days?! That’s it?! Four days?! And she only just now decides to tell him?!" She jumped up and brushed off her skirt. "This is ridiculous!" With that, she disappeared to appeal to the Lord of Nightmares at her ancient temple. No matter that L-Sama had told her on her previous visit to the temple that she wouldn’t give out any more information. This sort of a perversity really pissed Jessica off, and damned if she wasn’t going to try and make her goddess cough up some answers. "Four days," she muttered when she appeared in the temple. "Four days, my furry ass! I’d expect this kind of shit from Shabranigdo. I’d expect it from Zelas! No, I’d expect it from any of those rats, but from HER?! I know she’s a little capricious at times," she kicked a fallen bit of marble out of her path, "ok, she’s a lot capricious most of the time, but this! This really takes the cake!" She arrived at the crumbling alter and gave it a good, swift kick. "My Lady, we need to talk! Now!"
        Silence.
        "I know you can hear me, so show yourself! We need to talk about this time limit bullshit!"
        Silence.
        "Fine, I’ll talk, you listen." Jessica sat down on a big chunk of the alter, picked up a smaller piece of it and started whacking away at the big piece. "Four days is completely unreasonable. He only just found out about this cure a little over a week ago, and now you tell him he only has four more days to find the clues? Was this Zelas’ idea? Are you two girlfriends now? Is this all a big plot between the two of you to screw up the life of a randomly selected mutual descendant? What were you thinking? Why even bother to put a cure in the world for him if you planned to make it impossible for him to find it?! HUH?! ANSWER ME, DAMMIT!" She smashed the little piece to bits in her rage, but still the Lord of Nightmares didn’t appear. It then occurred to Jessica that she was wasting Zelgadis’ time while she screamed impotently at a god who wouldn’t respond. "Fine, then. I’ll help him as best I can, but if you want a priestess, you’ll have to find somebody else because I quit!" With that, she returned to Seyruun.
        L-Sama walked from behind a pillar and stood looking down at the marks Jessica had made on the alter stone. Not random, no. They were the ancient runes of the priestesses of the Lord of Nightmares. These particular runes formed the spell used to invoke her aid in an act of holy vengeance. In this case, the object of vengeance was L-Sama, herself, and the spell demanded her aid in righting the wrong that had been done to a certain chimera she’d come to know too well. Since they were carved into her own alter, according to the ancient ritual, she couldn’t ignore the spell, no matter what she thought of it. There were smaller marks below the spell, in another language, accusing her of breaking her vow not to interfere for the sole purpose of causing Zelgadis to fail. She was then challenged to interfere to help him, as well. Jessica’s sigil, the sign of the High Priestess, appeared below that, with a slash carved through it.
        "You weren’t joking about quitting my service…" L-Sama realized to her astonishment that that hurt. She returned to her home to smoke and drink and wonder what she should do about the invocation on her alter and the loss of her last and most powerful priestess.

Chapter 30